While Sachi was at dinner and my parents were away at the video store, I decided to meditate. To try and communicate with Wolf. I turned off the light in my room, drew the blinds, lit a candle and some incense. I sat cross-legged on the floor, in lotus position and asked the Great Spirit for help in communicating with Wolf. Deep breaths, slowing my breathing down, letting my body move as it would...entering something close to a dream state. I knew it was because a few times, I sighed like I do when I sleep.
A meadow with tall, green grass, large pine trees surrouding it but for the hillside. Where our den is. My mate's and my den. I was standing the grass on all fours. I was my wolf-self. Brown fur...and a creamy colored belly. Nothing unusual this time. I ask quietly if Wolf would come to me.... I sat in the grass and looked around...and a large gray wolf appeared, intense eyes watching me. Bowed to him. Though his expression didn't change...he smiled. More like he sent warmth to me.
I asked him about Sachi, even though I already know she is my soulmate. Suddenly, I saw Sachi in her kitsune form bounding toward me through the grass. She licked my cheek and I licked hers. Wolf told me 'she is your soulmate. There will be great happiness for you two'. Not in words...and not necessarily in English...but that was the meaning.
I asked him about the anxiety I've been having, if it would pass. Again, a feeling of 'smile' came from him. He told me yes, it would. That he would help. He told me that soon, my mate and I will be together and we will be very happy. Patience, he said. It will come. I asked him if wolf dreams would come back. He 'smiled' again and nodded.
I bowed again and thanked him. He told me to follow him. I was...confused. But, I went through the tall grass after him to the other end of the field, a bit away from the hillside den. He sat down and told me to look. It was an altar...a buffalo skull altar on a low mound of dirt and a pillar made of buffalo bones. I felt a rush. I asked 'what is it the Great Spirit has in mind for me?' 'Shaman' was the answer, that my words will 'help others'.
I thanked him with a low bow. Again, a 'smile'. I blinked and looked at my neck. A bear claw necklace...I couldn't count how many there were but they were on a leather cord around my neck. I looked back up and Wolf was gone. I breathed another thanks to him and bowed low before the altar, thanking the Great Spirit and giving a prayer of praise. Then, I bounded back to the den.
When I came out of the trance, I thanked the Great Spirit with my own voice. I feel very calm. Centered. The anxiety I was having before I meditated is gone. I know that I spoke to Wolf and that he heard me. I know that my path is that of a shaman. I'm comforted to know wolf dreams may soon return to me. And I have seen my mate in the dreamtime in her kitsune form.
There's the vision. :bows my muzzle respectfully: Thank you for listening my friends. More than ever before, I feel my tail behind me and my ear swivelling to take in the world around me. I think that I will be meditating a bit more often :smiles: